My Simple System for Building Self-Discipline (for normal people)!

1 00:00:00,210 --> 00:00:00,780 Discipline. 2 00:00:01,140 --> 00:00:01,680 What is it? 3 00:00:01,950 --> 00:00:03,390 What does it even matter? 4 00:00:03,390 --> 00:00:04,980 And how do we build it? 5 00:00:05,070 --> 00:00:09,270 Because a lot of people talk about it, but honest to God, most of the stuff 6 00:00:09,270 --> 00:00:13,170 I see out there is a really stupid idea on how to build discipline. 7 00:00:13,680 --> 00:00:17,310 Guys, we're gonna dig into this, and that's what we're talking about 8 00:00:17,315 --> 00:00:18,870 on this episode of the podcast. 9 00:00:18,875 --> 00:00:20,181 So let's get into it. 10 00:00:21,120 --> 00:00:22,740 Here's the million dollar question. 11 00:00:23,220 --> 00:00:26,250 How do men like us reach our full potential and grow 12 00:00:26,250 --> 00:00:27,330 into the men we dream of? 13 00:00:28,110 --> 00:00:33,330 While taking care of our responsibilities, working, being good husbands, fathers, 14 00:00:33,330 --> 00:00:35,700 and still take care of ourselves. 15 00:00:36,570 --> 00:00:38,280 That the question in this podcast. 16 00:00:38,580 --> 00:00:39,900 We'll help you with those answers. 17 00:00:39,905 --> 00:00:43,019 My name is Brent and welcome to the Fallible Man Podcast. 18 00:00:43,050 --> 00:00:45,360 Welcome to the Fable Man Podcast, Your home for all things, 19 00:00:45,360 --> 00:00:46,590 man, husband, and father. 20 00:00:47,100 --> 00:00:48,570 A big shout out to Fallible Nation. 21 00:00:48,570 --> 00:00:52,170 You guys make this possible and a warm welcome to our first time listeners. 22 00:00:52,175 --> 00:00:54,830 Thanks for joining us and welcome To the Fallible. 23 00:00:55,880 --> 00:00:58,190 My name is Brent and I am the fallible man. 24 00:00:59,060 --> 00:01:02,770 It's pretty obvious to nomenclature, cuz let's face it, I don't have 25 00:01:02,770 --> 00:01:04,450 all the answers and neither do you. 26 00:01:04,810 --> 00:01:06,400 So I wanted to be upfront about that. 27 00:01:07,690 --> 00:01:13,960 Now, discipline in this context is different than discipline that 28 00:01:13,960 --> 00:01:15,700 we're all terrified of, okay? 29 00:01:15,970 --> 00:01:18,130 We're not talking about being punished for bad things. 30 00:01:18,940 --> 00:01:21,700 Discipline has really negative connotations to it. 31 00:01:21,700 --> 00:01:23,140 So get that out of your mind for now. 32 00:01:23,140 --> 00:01:24,220 That's not what we're talking about. 33 00:01:25,375 --> 00:01:30,475 Discipline in this context, the way you hear people ranting about it on YouTube 34 00:01:30,505 --> 00:01:35,215 and other social media platforms is to find as like this I actually went 35 00:01:35,215 --> 00:01:36,475 to the dictionary to check this out. 36 00:01:37,195 --> 00:01:41,065 Training that corrects molds or perfects, the mental faculties 37 00:01:41,095 --> 00:01:42,565 are moral char moral character. 38 00:01:43,105 --> 00:01:44,245 That's mouthful. 39 00:01:44,845 --> 00:01:49,435 Our second definition that's similar to train or develop by instruction and 40 00:01:49,875 --> 00:01:52,285 exercise, especially in self control. 41 00:01:53,365 --> 00:01:55,975 Now, see, those aren't terrifying. 42 00:01:56,155 --> 00:01:58,405 Like we have these negative connotations about discipline. 43 00:01:58,735 --> 00:02:01,165 Those are actually like really beneficial things. 44 00:02:01,765 --> 00:02:03,625 But why should you care about discipline? 45 00:02:04,165 --> 00:02:05,695 What does it actually do for you? 46 00:02:06,625 --> 00:02:08,365 That's a valid question, right? 47 00:02:08,485 --> 00:02:10,975 Before you invest in something, before you like get into this 48 00:02:10,975 --> 00:02:12,316 discipline thing, what's the payout? 49 00:02:12,346 --> 00:02:13,426 Why would you do that? 50 00:02:15,226 --> 00:02:17,756 Discipline is what keeps you in the gym. 51 00:02:20,281 --> 00:02:26,701 Trying to build that muscle or lose that weight when you're tired and you don't 52 00:02:26,701 --> 00:02:28,171 wanna do it anymore and things hurt. 53 00:02:28,861 --> 00:02:32,431 Or from eating that super delicious looking donut in the break room 54 00:02:32,431 --> 00:02:37,081 when you're on a diet or right now during this season, right? 55 00:02:37,321 --> 00:02:40,381 Discipline is what keeps you from going through your kid's entire 56 00:02:40,381 --> 00:02:44,971 candy sash from Halloween, especially when you're trying to diet, right? 57 00:02:45,061 --> 00:02:46,141 I'm fighting that one right. 58 00:02:47,461 --> 00:02:49,171 Lot of candy laying around my house. 59 00:02:49,231 --> 00:02:54,181 This one is what keeps me out of that bag because I'm trying to lose some weight. 60 00:02:55,561 --> 00:02:59,641 Discipline is what gets you outta bed at O Dart 30 to pursue that side hustle. 61 00:03:00,781 --> 00:03:03,571 Or what keeps you from going, drinking with your buddies when you 62 00:03:03,571 --> 00:03:08,101 really need to stay in and study for that exam or that new certification 63 00:03:08,101 --> 00:03:09,301 or whatever you're studying for. 64 00:03:10,441 --> 00:03:14,521 Motivation is really fickle inspiration fades and that really 65 00:03:14,521 --> 00:03:15,781 great life changing idea you. 66 00:03:16,721 --> 00:03:19,981 It goes out the window faster than New Year's resolution. 67 00:03:20,041 --> 00:03:25,981 Without discipline, those things will fail you almost every time. 68 00:03:25,986 --> 00:03:32,281 External drivers just, they don't hold up as the days and miles grow by discipline 69 00:03:32,286 --> 00:03:34,471 is how great athletes reach their goals. 70 00:03:34,476 --> 00:03:38,271 And men like Elon Musk build the future, right? 71 00:03:38,671 --> 00:03:41,161 I mean, besides Twitter, which we're all reading about and 72 00:03:41,161 --> 00:03:42,301 seeing all over the news. 73 00:03:43,516 --> 00:03:45,016 He's trying to do what now? 74 00:03:45,028 --> 00:03:48,928 We're still trying to go to Mars and build a colony there, or is it some mag train? 75 00:03:48,928 --> 00:03:51,807 The guy is always trying to build something new and better 76 00:03:51,807 --> 00:03:53,380 the world and I'm glad for that. 77 00:03:54,520 --> 00:03:57,550 Not saying he's perfect, but you know, he's trying, I think that's 78 00:03:57,550 --> 00:04:02,500 what it seems like discipline is how he achieves those things. 79 00:04:03,100 --> 00:04:06,490 The great thing about discipline is that it's a skill. 80 00:04:08,050 --> 00:04:08,440 It can be. 81 00:04:09,580 --> 00:04:14,076 It can be learned, it can be experienced, and it can be grown 82 00:04:14,436 --> 00:04:16,746 and solidified and made stronger. 83 00:04:18,006 --> 00:04:21,666 You may struggle along the way, but here's the really big secret that everybody 84 00:04:21,671 --> 00:04:27,186 doesn't wanna talk about, is everybody struggles with building their discipline. 85 00:04:28,236 --> 00:04:30,636 Put in the reps and you will absolutely build your. 86 00:04:33,351 --> 00:04:35,991 Warren Buffet said, We don't have to be smarter than the rest. 87 00:04:36,201 --> 00:04:38,661 We have to be more disciplined than the rest. 88 00:04:40,311 --> 00:04:44,271 Now, that's my argument for why you should practice, discipline 89 00:04:44,271 --> 00:04:45,261 and grow your discipline guys. 90 00:04:45,651 --> 00:04:49,401 And so I want to give you nine steps to rinse and repeat that will 91 00:04:49,401 --> 00:04:51,381 help you build your discipline. 92 00:04:52,401 --> 00:04:52,881 Okay? 93 00:04:53,151 --> 00:04:56,541 So if you're driving, please don't try write this down, but 94 00:04:56,541 --> 00:04:58,431 if you've got a second pause the. 95 00:04:59,241 --> 00:05:01,761 And get out of pen and paper and write these down. 96 00:05:01,761 --> 00:05:04,401 If you don't have the moment right now, if you're driving or something, 97 00:05:05,031 --> 00:05:06,231 listen to the show again later. 98 00:05:06,231 --> 00:05:07,221 Just listen to this piece. 99 00:05:07,221 --> 00:05:11,481 It's gonna be a short show, and write down these nine steps and they will help you 100 00:05:11,486 --> 00:05:13,671 get on track to building your discipline. 101 00:05:14,361 --> 00:05:16,431 Number one, find a solid why. 102 00:05:16,971 --> 00:05:18,861 It has to be emotionally significant. 103 00:05:19,641 --> 00:05:27,591 It will fail if it's not, You can't have some flimsy external motivation. 104 00:05:28,026 --> 00:05:29,766 You have to find your why. 105 00:05:30,426 --> 00:05:33,816 You want to do this internally or it's gonna fall apart. 106 00:05:34,386 --> 00:05:35,796 It's gotta mean something to you. 107 00:05:36,576 --> 00:05:38,286 Number two, create a plan of attack. 108 00:05:39,126 --> 00:05:39,546 Okay? 109 00:05:39,846 --> 00:05:41,616 We talk a lot about setting goals. 110 00:05:41,646 --> 00:05:42,756 This is what we're talking about here. 111 00:05:43,116 --> 00:05:44,076 Create a plan. 112 00:05:44,076 --> 00:05:44,946 Set the goals. 113 00:05:44,951 --> 00:05:46,116 Set the pieces in place. 114 00:05:46,356 --> 00:05:52,746 Now break it into smaller pieces and track them now that you have your plan. 115 00:05:52,746 --> 00:05:56,946 Number three is identify and remove those obs, remove obstacles to those goals. 116 00:05:58,161 --> 00:06:00,741 Temptations, things that distract you. 117 00:06:00,741 --> 00:06:03,921 Excuses, if you're trying to lose weight, get the crap out of the house. 118 00:06:03,921 --> 00:06:05,631 The junk food that you know is gonna attempt you. 119 00:06:06,081 --> 00:06:08,481 If you're trying to spend more time studying. 120 00:06:09,351 --> 00:06:10,641 Block out your schedule better. 121 00:06:11,061 --> 00:06:16,011 Remove the obstacles that you can see that are coming down the road for you. 122 00:06:16,016 --> 00:06:17,481 Chasing those go goals. 123 00:06:18,021 --> 00:06:21,771 Number four, make physical adjustments to make it easier. 124 00:06:22,431 --> 00:06:23,661 Pack your gear the night. 125 00:06:24,711 --> 00:06:28,431 Set calendar blocks that are just solidly set. 126 00:06:28,491 --> 00:06:29,961 There's no wiggle room. 127 00:06:30,501 --> 00:06:31,941 And be sure to set reminders on them. 128 00:06:32,511 --> 00:06:38,121 Personal experience, set reminders so you get alerted cuz I can get 129 00:06:38,121 --> 00:06:41,361 into something and totally blow off my calendar or forget things. 130 00:06:42,081 --> 00:06:43,191 Adjust your schedule. 131 00:06:43,661 --> 00:06:46,131 Put that pull up bar where you walk by it all the time. 132 00:06:46,431 --> 00:06:51,021 Make physical adjustments to make it easier to accomplish your goals. 133 00:06:51,921 --> 00:06:55,731 Number five is make habits, the support, the plan, and I want you to 134 00:06:55,731 --> 00:06:57,381 do 'em over and over and over again. 135 00:06:57,921 --> 00:07:01,952 Now, I hate to say I want you to do them, but you have to understand, if you 136 00:07:01,952 --> 00:07:04,262 do 'em for a week, it's not gonna help. 137 00:07:05,822 --> 00:07:11,055 I was talking to a psychotherapist, some I can't even pronounce what 138 00:07:11,055 --> 00:07:15,675 she was, neuro psychotherapist or something, and she said, Bare 139 00:07:15,675 --> 00:07:18,585 minimum, 65 days to create a habit. 140 00:07:20,415 --> 00:07:22,665 Every day guys, do them over and over again. 141 00:07:22,665 --> 00:07:27,355 Small habits, the support, the goals you're trying to achieve. 142 00:07:27,355 --> 00:07:29,481 I promise this is getting to ahead of why. 143 00:07:29,631 --> 00:07:29,991 Okay. 144 00:07:30,921 --> 00:07:34,431 Number six, start small and build up to bigger goals as your discipline grows. 145 00:07:35,241 --> 00:07:38,601 Guys, we are all about success. 146 00:07:38,601 --> 00:07:42,711 Stacking our wind, stacking on this channel, something I've talked 147 00:07:42,711 --> 00:07:46,461 about a lot, both on my live stream and on the podcast before Stack. 148 00:07:46,461 --> 00:07:47,001 Little win. 149 00:07:48,096 --> 00:07:52,176 As you stack little wins and get more wins under your belt, it's easier 150 00:07:52,176 --> 00:07:54,336 to conquer those bigger goals too. 151 00:07:54,936 --> 00:07:59,196 So start small and build the bigger goals as your discipline level grows. 152 00:08:00,186 --> 00:08:03,696 Number seven, get somebody to hold you accountable that you actually 153 00:08:03,696 --> 00:08:07,266 value and listen to people's, people blow this all the time. 154 00:08:08,496 --> 00:08:12,246 If it's somebody you easily blow off, they're not a good person to 155 00:08:12,246 --> 00:08:14,406 have as your accountability person. 156 00:08:15,186 --> 00:08:19,266 If it's somebody you don't listen to their advice anyway, not a good person to 157 00:08:19,266 --> 00:08:21,996 have as your accountability person, okay? 158 00:08:21,996 --> 00:08:25,386 You need to have somebody who it matters when they speak to 159 00:08:25,386 --> 00:08:27,966 you to help you be accountable. 160 00:08:29,076 --> 00:08:30,186 Number eight, succeed. 161 00:08:31,026 --> 00:08:34,146 Right Now you're like, Whoa, Brent, we're dumping head no. 162 00:08:34,151 --> 00:08:35,166 I want you to succeed. 163 00:08:35,586 --> 00:08:36,576 Small, right? 164 00:08:36,576 --> 00:08:43,986 Small goals, small steps, small things succeed at those number. 165 00:08:44,751 --> 00:08:48,291 I want you to do it, especially when it sucks and you don't want to do it. 166 00:08:49,641 --> 00:08:53,391 This is really, really important because there will come a point where 167 00:08:53,391 --> 00:08:58,551 all these changes, you're too tired, it's too early, you're worn out. 168 00:08:59,511 --> 00:09:03,561 That is the most important time for you to do this, do it, especially when it sucks. 169 00:09:03,561 --> 00:09:05,061 Now, Brent, how does this help us? 170 00:09:05,061 --> 00:09:07,111 Well, this is how it builds discipline . Okay. 171 00:09:07,182 --> 00:09:09,252 Let me walk you through why this works. 172 00:09:10,212 --> 00:09:11,502 The more you succeed. 173 00:09:12,192 --> 00:09:13,872 Back to stacking winds. 174 00:09:14,172 --> 00:09:16,482 The more you succeed, the easier you're gonna find it. 175 00:09:16,482 --> 00:09:20,982 Stay on the path and other things you can do. 176 00:09:20,987 --> 00:09:26,742 Crash plans like, uh, take a nice cold shower at the cracker dawn, or 177 00:09:26,742 --> 00:09:30,222 torture yourself with grueling workouts that just suck man and burn yourself. 178 00:09:30,552 --> 00:09:31,272 You're gonna burn out. 179 00:09:31,392 --> 00:09:33,192 It's not actually gonna be long term discipline. 180 00:09:33,702 --> 00:09:36,582 This horrible advice, and I've seen it way too often on YouTube. 181 00:09:37,812 --> 00:09:40,332 Put in the reps and succeed over and over again. 182 00:09:40,332 --> 00:09:41,262 Stack win. 183 00:09:41,907 --> 00:09:47,667 Now, as you succeed at small goals, by following your plan, by following these 184 00:09:47,667 --> 00:09:54,117 steps, by following these stages as you go, as you make little wins, your brain 185 00:09:54,477 --> 00:09:58,947 will start to have more discipline because you're gonna go, You know, I followed 186 00:09:58,947 --> 00:10:00,537 this plan and I succeeded at this. 187 00:10:01,017 --> 00:10:01,827 I followed this plan. 188 00:10:01,827 --> 00:10:02,877 I succeeded at this. 189 00:10:02,907 --> 00:10:04,227 I followed this plan, I succeeded. 190 00:10:04,617 --> 00:10:09,627 And the more you succeed, the more wins you make with the little build as you go. 191 00:10:10,857 --> 00:10:17,457 The easier it is to have the discipline and the faith in your plan to continue. 192 00:10:19,017 --> 00:10:20,637 As your goals get bigger and bigger. 193 00:10:20,967 --> 00:10:23,997 Discipline will become your best friend because you'll have the experience 194 00:10:23,997 --> 00:10:28,737 that tells you, if I go A to Z, if I follow this goals, if I follow 195 00:10:28,737 --> 00:10:31,517 this pathway, I'm going to succeed. 196 00:10:33,582 --> 00:10:35,682 Guys, be better tomorrow because of what you do today. 197 00:10:36,012 --> 00:10:36,972 We'll see you on the next one. 198 00:10:37,872 --> 00:10:40,392 This has been the Fable Man Podcast. 199 00:10:40,992 --> 00:10:44,382 Your home for everything, man, husband, and father. 200 00:10:45,132 --> 00:10:47,412 Be sure to subscribe so you don't miss a show. 201 00:10:48,282 --> 00:10:54,642 Head over to www.thefableman.com for more content and get 202 00:10:54,642 --> 00:10:56,172 your own fallible man gear.